Introducing Yourself to New People and Making Small Talk

There are lots of possible situations where you’ll meet new people: at a party, in the student lounge, at a conference, on the train, while traveling, just to name a few.

What do you usually say when you meet someone new?

How do you introduce yourself?

Do you find it difficult to continue the conversation with them after exchanging names?

Even though the language we use to make small talk with new people may appear to be very simple, it is often difficult to use fluently without practice.

(In addition, some questions which are normal in your native country are actually considered rude in the United States!)

Let me guide you. In this article, I’m going to give you some tips on how to find out information you’re interested in from someone new.

Introducing Yourself to New People

If I’m honest, introducing yourself can be the most challenging part of a conversation. Even native speakers feel a little shy when approaching someone new.

That’s why you usually practice the easiest way to introduce yourself in beginning English classes:

  • Hi!  I’m _____________.  What’s your name?

However, there are many other ways to introduce yourself. These expressions sound a little more natural. Make sure you pay attention to your tone so that you sound friendly.

  • Hi there!  My name’s _________.  What’s yours?
  • I don’t think we’ve met.  I’m ___________.
  • I don’t believe we’ve met before.  My name is __________.
  • Have we met?  I’m ____________.
  • I think I’ve seen you around, but we haven’t officially met.  I’m _________.
Don’t forget to say, “Nice to meet you!” after the other person says his/her name!

Introducing People to Each Other

At any social event, you are probably going to introduce other people to each other and talk with more than one person at a time, which makes conversation much more interesting.

Here are some good ways to introduce two people who haven’t met:

  • I’d like you to meet ____________.
  • This is ______________.
  • I’d like to introduce you to _______________.
  • Have you met ____________?  (This phrase was made famous by Barney Stinson in How I Met Your Mother, as you see in this video!)

Small Talk Topics

When meeting someone new, we usually stick to very basic conversation topics until we get to know the person better.

While you may want to learn a lot about an interesting person, you need to be careful not to ask too many personal questions the first time you meet.

Please note: in the United States, it is rude to ask, “How old are you?”  Age is not a common topic of conversation with people you have just met.

Americans are well-known for almost always asking these three questions:

  • What do you do for work?
  • Where did you go to school?  (This question means, what college or university did you attend?)
  • What brings you to __(this event/this party)__?

In general, people will ask you about work or school as soon as they meet you.

They may ask “What brings you here?” to find out more about you without being too direct.

This question encourages you to talk more about yourself and give reasons for attending the event. (Watch the video lesson on the question “What brings you here?” for more details.)

Similarly, if you live in a city like Boston with a lot of neighborhoods and nearby cities, another neutral topic is asking for more details about where you live.

  • Do you live in __(this city/this neighborhood)__?
  • What brings you to __(this city/this area)__?
  • Where do you live?
  • Where are you living?
  • What kind of place do you live in?  (Is it an apartment, a house, a dormitory, etc.?)
  • What’s your place like?
  • How do you like living here/there?

If you are just visiting or are not from the United States, people will usually ask you more questions about your background and for your opinion about their city.

  • Where are you from originally?
  • Where are you from in __(your country)__?
  • What are you doing in __(this city)__?
  • How do you like living here?
  • What do you think about __(this city)__?
  • Do you like it here?

Asking about Romantic Partners and Family

Let’s be honest: if you are single and talking to someone attractive, you probably want to know whether they have a boyfriend/girlfriend or romantic partner, are married, or have kids.

However, it’s best not to be too direct when asking questions about the other person’s relationships.  You can ask in a more indirect way:

  • Are you here with anyone?
  • Did you come here with anyone?
  • Did you move to __(this city)__ on your own?
  • Do you live with anyone / with roommates?  (Note: In most countries, people live with their parents until they get married, but this is not that common in the United States.  If you ask someone older than 20 if they live with their family, they may be confused or assume that you think they are married with children.)

If you have been talking to this new person for a while, you can ask more direct questions:

  • Is there anyone special in your life?
  • Do you have any kids?

Americans also really like their pets, so it’s common to ask, “Do you have any pets?”

Remember that you should not make someone feel bad for being single.  Americans get married later than people in many countries. If the person you are talking to says that he/she is single, you can always talk about the good things about being single, like the freedom to travel!

Conversation Topics

After learning basic information about the person you have just met, you can continue the conversation by asking him/her more general questions.

This also enables you to find something in common!  Here are some basic questions to start with:

  • What do you like to do?
  • What do you like to do outside of work/school?
  • What kinds of things interest you?
  • What kinds of things do you do in your free time?
  • Do you like/watch/follow any sports/TV series?

Deciding to Continue or End the Conversation

As you can see, making small talk with someone you’ve just met is easy if you remember to stick to neutral, general conversation topics.

After you’ve talked for a while, you may want to continue the conversation and can ask for more details about their work, studies, or interests. (Get some suggestions here.)

If you don’t want to continue talking, you should end the conversation politely:

  • It was nice meeting you.  See you later!
  • There is someone I want to say “hi” to over there.  Nice talking with you!
  • I’m going to get a drink/some water.  Nice to meet you!

Your Turn

After reading this article, I hope you feel more confident and comfortable introducing yourself to and making small talk with new people.

You may be interested in my article on how to make small talk with acquaintances and friends you run into unexpectedly.

Now it’s your turn! Please leave a comment below introducing yourself and asking me one of the questions we discussed above! I’ll respond and we’ll get the conversation going.

Remember, the language is simple, but you must practice!

In order to improve your conversation skills, you must find opportunities to interact, so go to a party or event, introduce yourself to someone new at your school, or talk to someone at a bus stop.

The more you practice, the easier it becomes!

Ready to communicate more effectively in conversations? Learn communication skills that enable you to connect with other people and engage in natural conversations and professional discussions. Get started here.

53 thoughts on “Introducing Yourself to New People and Making Small Talk”

  1. There’s this guy that i really like, and i dont know how to start a conversation with him. I’m in 10th grade and he is in 11th grade. I dont want to scare him when i talk to him, but i dont know how to introduce myself please help me


    • Hi Roman! Social interactions in high school can be quite challenging, but I always encourage people to be friendly and start simply with “hello.” Finding a shared interest is always an easy way to start a conversation, as is mentioning that you’ve seen the person before. Try a phrase like, “I’m not sure we’ve met. I’m Roman” and see where the conversation goes!

      • My problem is like that ma i can’t introduceing my self among people i need you assistance what i will say at the first moment when i introduceing myself

        • The simplest way to introduce yourself is to say “Hi, I’m ____.” You can find other ways to introduce yourself at the beginning of the article. What you say next depends on the context. If you’re at a conference, meeting, or networking event, you might share some details about your work. If it’s a social event, you may want to ask a question like, “What brings you here?”

  2. Hi! I’m not sure how to introduce myself with this new girl in my high school English class. She’s new and I want to get to be friends with her. I already kinda introduced myself but i’m still not sure what to say when I see her around. Can you help me?

  3. Hi! I read very carefully your article. And I found it very interesting. But I have a big problem. I come from Benin, a west africa french speaking country; and it’s difficult for me to get started in english. When I open my mouth, I usualy forget every thing in english. Do you have any recepe for me?

  4. Hi! I really appreciate your article it’s very interesting and more clearly. But the problem is we don’ t speak currently english and I have difficult to communicate correctly. I need your help and advice also.

      • Hi Kim, I really enjoy your article, it helps us to get familiar with someone. I have learned some things from your article which would help me in future conversations.
        Thanks for this help.

        • That’s awesome! I hope you have great conversations and feel more comfortable when you meet someone new.

  5. Hello kim really love your article, but please i just want to ask a question please, for instance you said hello to someone and the person asked you. who are you or do we know each other what is should i reply with?
    please i get it more difficult when it gets to that stage please

    • Your response depends on the situation. Where are you introducing yourself to someone? Should they know who you are? If they’re not sure they remember you, but you’ve definitely met before, share a detail that helps jog their memory. “Yes, I’m _____. We met a few months/years ago at [event/gathering].” If you can share a few more details of that last interaction, that will help them remember. If you haven’t met before, what you say depends on the nature of the event and why you’re approaching them.

  6. i’m a student. if i study in computer science engineering in Wuhan university of techonology then how to say it to my friends family. please help me . my sentence is not perfect. i want to be more accurate. thank u .

    • You’re very close: “I study computer science (or computer engineering, or computer science and engineering, depending on the actual name of the field of study at your university) at Wuhan University of Technology.”

  7. I love your article Kim. I wish to introduce myself to a new foreign friend whom I was connected with by my boss to share me some work related skills. How can I introduce myself to him? Thank you.

    • Simple is usually best in these cases: I was given your contact information by [name] so that we could connect to discuss [work-related topic]. At that point, you can introduce yourself and provide any details that give context, like what you’re working on, your role at work, or the topic you’re interested in discussing.

  8. Hi Kim, thank you very much for the article. this is very useful for me. I get bored teaching “self Introduction” in very usual ways. but suddenly I came across your article..well, …I am happy…

    • You’re most welcome! I’m glad you found this helpful and that it gave you different ways to talk about introductions.


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